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Cloaca No. 5: The machine that drops a deuce

Posted in Robots by Conner Flynn on February 2nd, 2009

Cloaca No. 5: The machine that drops a deuceCloaca No. 5 is very similar to Chanel No. 5, the perfume. One smells like crap, the other is a machine that actually dumps on command. It’s a “mechanized sculpture” that reproduces the human digestive system in every detail. The end result is just like you and me, the machine produces feces, only when it pinches a loaf it comes out vacuum-packed.

Yeah, a machine that poos. There’s another thing a robot does better then humans. It’s part of an exhibition that’s open until valentine’s day in the universite du quebec’s art, Montreal. Cloaca is made of steel, rubber and glass and is fed twice a day with cafeteria leftovers.

Soda cup phone

Posted in Telephones by Conner Flynn on December 24th, 2008

Soda cup phoneThe Soda Cup phone is a bit more stealthy then the average hamburger phone. The cord is the only thing that gives it away as a phone. If they had made a cordless model, it would fool everybody.

Just answer this phone in front of somebody and they will feel like they are on drugs. Dude that’s a phone? At $14, you can’t afford not to buy this smiley freckle faced fake cup with weird generic Soda name.

Star Wars TV/DVD with Lightsaber remote

Posted in Star Wars by Conner Flynn on October 23rd, 2008

Star Wars TV/DVD with Lightsaber remoteOpen letter to George Lucas: Please get a new hobby. Indy is just recovering from your brutal raping of him as you prepare to do it again in Indy V. You raped a Sarlacc Pitt sized hole in the Star Wars universe with Jar-Jar alone. And the merchandise that you approve gets crappier by the day. This Star Wars TV/DVD with Lightsaber Remote is a cheap plastic piece of turd that makes me feel sad. Even the lightsaber remote doesn’t help it. Please George, take up poker or backgammon, maybe bowling. We have suffered enough.

Radio City Valve Radio

Posted in Radio by Conner Flynn on June 19th, 2008

Radio City Valve Radio
The problem with the Radio City Valve Radio, aside from the fact that it doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, is that they just kinda slapped a bunch of stuff together and then went so far as to have a plaque on the front that says “Radio City”. Yeah, we’re going to Radio city. Not.

I’m pretty sure the glass or plastic tubes do nothing except emit that faint light you see. And am I seeing this right? It looks like they just went crazy and threw a heatsink behind them for pure kicks. Only our friends in China could show such a lack of style. I mean, the whole deal just looks unfinished and very toy-like.